Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
