I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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