he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize