i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
