I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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