The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
