Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
