I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
