i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
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