Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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