im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
