I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
