i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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