So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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