I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
