do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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