I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Randomize
