my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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