Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
