I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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