The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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