dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
