I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
She even gives head with a lisp.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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