Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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