On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
That reminds me...we need to get swords
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Sorry my hands just texted you
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
