This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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