You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
In America we eat man semen.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
