Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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