wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
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