8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
my shit smells like andre
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize