I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
