the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
