We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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