Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
