I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
