He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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