Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
