i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I pour the whiskey from now on
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
