you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
