You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
