So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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