If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
My vagina is officially offended.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
