I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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