WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
We just shotgunned beers for America
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
