I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
