I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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