You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
