she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize
