Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
