please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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