Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I hope mine doesn't look like that
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
